One of the saddest news you will ever get concerning your friend is that they took their life. What a heart wrenching feeling. What an emptiness, what sadness that wants to overwhelm you.
You mind fills with questions:
Why would did they end their life?
How is it they lost their hope in Jesus?
Who else is affected?
Lord, what could I have done?
Finding Your Direction
Recently I have been listening to audio books more as I am able to somewhat multi-task while doing so. I came across an audio book on Audible that caught my attention. It is called, “The Peacemaker: A Biblical Guide to Resolving Personal Conflict.”
Something they mentioned in the audio sample that caught my attention is that suicide is the ultimate to running from facing conflict.
We who are saved are called to be peacemakers. And we forget that in order to do so we must be involved in conflict. Sometimes that conflict is not easy to deal with. I understand the desperation of being near making a decision that would have been just as devasting as my friend’s.
It was during a time that I faced a lot of conflict especially in relationships. But by the grace of God at the moment of weakness when I thought life was not worth living God sent his messangers, friends who help me find my direction.
And knowing the truth does set you free. Now it may take some time but God is faithful. At the moment the conflict is not pleasant. But as time goes on you will discover real purpose even in conflict.
Healing the Wounds
As one who has faced the temptation thinking that ending one’s life would solve everything and now facing the terrible news of a friend who actually took her life I have much to reflect on.
My friend who took her life was one an older woman, someone I looked up to. I cannot help but think, “what if” I had made the same wrong choice?
Oh just the thought of that made me cry. I would have let down the young lady I was to meet years later that I am discipling now. Oh wow I would not trade that relationship as it was a long desire of my heart to find such a passionate young woman in Christ.
I would have let my dear friend Mercedes, here in Nicaragua, down who I was to tell her the very scripture that my friend who eventually took her life gave me John 8:32.
And oh how my heart ached for my friend who took her life thinking, “Lord why didn’t she believe the truth herself?”
Yes, healing must take place and it is done by the power of the truth.
As I reflect on all this I realize that what has helped me tremendously is putting my mind on Christ, the very Truth. Not as someone I know of, but someone who I am knowing personally more each day and He knows me.
Now conflicts still arise but I have learned to accept all my Lord has for me with open arms. Because I know my God and I know my purpose…an intercessor and peacemaker for the glory of God.
Praising God for Faithful Friends
I am so thankful for faithful friends in Christ as another young lady encouraged me so much in the Lord this past Easter Sunday. I had taken a nap that afternoon and when I woke I felt very sad. Yes I was thinking of my friend who took her life.
As my young friend and I were talking I mentioned to her that I was sad. I want to share the following exhortation she gave me because I know that you may need to hear it too. This is concerning losing a loved one or a dear friend. May it bless your heart as it did me:
“Smile, thank God for the good, and remember to thank Him even for the bad- He always uses the bad things in life for good in the end. Don’t forget that! It’s sad, and there is a time and place for grief. Just be careful not to dwell on that sadness. I know you looked up to her, but remember, man falls. She was only human, and couldn’t have lived up to the highest of standards. She was hurting, struggling. She made her choice, and it destroyed her and has hurt those who loved her in her life and love the memories of her today. When those good memories arise, whether it be through pictures or song or anything, remember those good times and praise Him and thank Him for the good times you did have. When you begin to be sad, thank Him and ask Him to cheer your spirit and remind you of the joy of your life in Christ.”
Praise the Lord for dear friends who point you to the TRUTH. And that truth is Jesus.
Willing to Hear and Accept the Truth
The key in all this is you must be willing to hear and accept the truth. Fill your mind with our Lord and not the lies that come from the enemy or your own discouraging thoughts. Regardless of the conflict God is still on the throne and ALL is for your good and for His glory (Romans 8:28).
What my young friend shared with me with all boldness and respect was the truth. She reminded me to open 
my eyes to it all around me. God has a wonderful purpose for you. It may be difficult right now but what are these moments compared to all eternity.
A book I recommend especially for women that was recommended by a dear friend of mine and online mentor, Carol Amato, is called, “Lies Women Believe and the Truth That Sets Them Free” by Nancy DeMoss. Talk about an eye opener! I chose the audio version as well.
What is Your Struggle?
What is it that you are struggling with right now? Are you someone who has lost a friend to suicide? Are you struggling with thoughts of suicide yourself? My friend your hope is the TRUTH fill your mind with who Christ is.
I know that everything that happens is for a purpose. Even my friend’s death, though it was her choice, has tremendously impacted my life to believe the truth more than ever.
What about you?
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